Laura Scott, of Roanoke, Va., knew from an early age that she did not want to be a mother. On her first date with her now-husband, she made it clear that she didn’t want children. He agreed.
“I’m 46 this year,” says Scott, “and have yet to feel a pang of longing for a child.”
Scott represents a growing segment of the American population who are voluntarily “childfree.”
According to the 2004 U.S. Census Bureau data, the proportion of childless women aged between 15-44 was 44.6 percent, up from 35 percent in 1976. Part of this increase could be due to a decline in teenage pregnancy since the 1970s. But in 2000, 19 percent of women 40-44 (considered the end of child-bearing years) had never had a child. That was nearly double the 10 percent who were childless in 1980.
Paul Davis, licensed minister, author and worldwide life coach, attributes the falling birth rate to several factors. “Society has lost its sense of family and become increasingly individualistic,” he says. “This combined with a pro-inflation economic policy and taxation at every level of government has placed unusual demands upon families, causing women to seek employment rather than motherhood. Sexual promiscuity and diseases have led to ‘safe sex’ contraceptive use which further negatively effects the birth rate.” Davis was trained by the Assemblies of God Chi Alpha Campus Ministry Pioneering Track in summer of 2007.
Other reasons for the declining birth rate are infertility and delayed marriage, which often translates to delayed or forfeited parenthood. Jennifer Marshall, domestic policy director at The Heritage Foundation in Washington, D.C., notes that the median age of first marriage in the U.S. has risen more than four years in the last generation: now it’s almost 26 years old.
“That aspect of extended singleness means that many young women are single and not child bearing during some of their most fertile years,” Marshall says. “I can’t quantify the impact, but its’ certainly an interesting trend that will have ramifications for child-bearing in the next decade.” Marshall is the author of Now and Not Yet: Making Sense of Single Life in the 21st Century.
A July 2007 Pew Research Center survey found that just 41 percent of Americans now say that children are “very important” to a successful marriage, down from the 65 percent who said this in a 1990 survey. Children have fallen to eighth place on a list of nine items that people associate with successful marriages. In 1990, given the same list, Americans had ranked children third in importance.
Childless couples are typically more educated than the general population, less bound by traditional gender roles, and appear to be less influenced by societal norms. They are less likely than the general public to describe themselves as devout or religious.
Scott, a freelance writer, spent more than three years traveling North America interviewing for her book and documentary projects on the trend. Her survey of 171 childless by choice couples named the following top six motives to remain childless:
1) I love our life, our relationship, as it is, and having a child won't enhance it.
2) I value freedom and independence.
3) I do not want to take on the responsibility of raising a child.
4) I have no desire to have a child, no maternal/paternal instinct.
5) I want to accomplish/experience things in life that would be difficult to do if I was a parent.
6) I want to focus my time and energy on my own interests, needs, or goals.
“Some want to have and do what please them only, without the encumbrances of other people, whether it’s children or adults,” says Dennis Franck, AG director of Single Adult Ministries. “Society has become very self-centered. On the other hand, one reason for remaining childless could be if God has called a couple into ministry in a country where having children could prove to be dangerous and a hindrance, rather than a help to their ministry.”
Declining birthrates and aging population are a global phenomenon, with Europe clearly in the lead. Every society needs its women to produce at least 2.1 children, on average, to replace itself. (The fraction is necessary to account for accidental deaths and disease.) Most of Europe is already living below its replacement rate, with Germany’s average around 1.3 and Italy’s average 1.28. America’s average is just about 2.07 children per woman. The U.S. Census Bureau forecasted that by 2050, the population will grow by 49 percent, down from the 87 percent gain in the previous 50 years.
Greg Mundis, AG regional director of Europe, notes that the ramifications of depopulation are huge, and have prompted governments of several countries to offer financial incentives for having kids (which rarely work). “The working population pays the bills for the medical and all the social services,” he says. “If the working population declines, then the bills cannot be paid. If immigrants are used to shore up the working population, governments have to deal with ghettos of ethnic people that are on the margins of society, different religious and cultural traditions, and some radically different worldviews. Europe is experiencing this with the millions of immigrant workers coming into the European Union.”
According to Bob Lepine, co-host of the Family Life Today radio show, Christian couples should take the Genesis command to “be fruitful and multiply” seriously, unless there is a mitigating circumstance (i.e. health).
“It’s important to make children a priority [even if it means putting our own dreams on hold],” Lepine says. “I don’t see where scripture is about our own self-fulfillment. I see Christ calling us to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow him. To the couples who say I would not be all I think God wants me to be if I had children, I would say, part of what God wants you to be as husband or wife, is to be mom and dad if God blesses you with children.”
